Tuesday, 4 September 2012

NO to polygamy in Tunisia

Tunisia is the only country in the Arab Muslim world where polygamy is forbidden by law. The Personal Status Code passed in 1956 by late Tunisian President Habib Bourguiba prohibited polygamy, gender inequality, facilitated women’s ability to obtain divorce,  banned forced marriages for minor girls etc. 

Now, after the Tunisian revolution, and despite The commitment of Ennahdha, the islamist ruling party, has pledged to preserve women’s rights, few Islamist figures are calling to legalise polygamy in Tunisia.

One of these "newly born islamist", is The head of a Tunisian Islamist association, "Tunisian Moderate Association for Awareness and Reform, formerly known as the Commission for the Promotion of Virtue and Prevention of Vice" Adel ELMI, who is calling the Tunisian government to legalise polygamy and to cancel all laws that contradict Islamic principles.
The practice was permitted in Islam and should be legalized if it in the interest of Tunisian society so said Elmi at Al-Jazeera. 

I have to admit that In Islam, polygyny is allowed, with the specific limitation that a man can have up to four wives.  Also, The Quran clearly states that men must deal with their wives justly but If the husband fears that he cannot deal with his wives justly, then he should only marry one. I have to emphasise, that men must be just :financially as well as emotionally, which is almost impossible to do. I here refer to emotional feelings that MUST be equally shared between the wives. And we all know how hard it is, if not IMPOSSIBLE.
Besides, Each of those wives must have her own property, assets. Usually the wives lead separate lives in their own houses, even-though, they all share the same husband. 

Now; my question to men and specifically to this Elmi, did you ever think about those women's feelings besides your egoism and personal enjoyment. How about the negative sides of polygamy do they even occur to them ?
How selfish can Men be !
Now allow me to state a few of the many negative sides to polygamy :

* What about jealousy among the wives ? Which will lead to depression and neglect of the children.  No matter how much a mother may love her children, if she is in jealousy state of mind she cannot optimally tend to the emotional and physical needs of her children.  

* Money problems : let's face it, feeding 4 wives plus at least 12 children is not easy nowadays. Add to it; schooling, clothing etc. just imagining the situation gives me a headache.

*Effect on children: With a big number of children, The husband AKA the father will not be able to justly and fairly spread his love around the children which will lead to the development of low self-esteem in addition to, rivalry among wives which will cause hate between children, division and discrimination at a young age.  

Now, considering the Tunisian economic crisis, poverty, unemployment high rate do YOU really think polygamy is the solution to our misery ?

But since the Islamic Ennahdha Party came to power, we Tunisian women, are unfortunately, witnessing a high possibility of losing some of our rights